Addicted to Approval?

“Once you free yourself from the need for perfect acceptance, it’s a lot easier to launch work that matters.” ~ Seth Godin

Everyone has an opinion

I’ve noticed how often I wondered what others would think before I took an action or made a decision. In the past, there have been times when I felt addicted to wanting approval from others before moving forward.

My husband is reading a book that makes the distinction between choices and decisions. The author says CHOICES are made from the heart, while DECISIONS are made from the intellect. I’m learning to trust my choices and have quit making decisions by committee. I gather information from a variety of sources (including my gut) and then choose. I’ve given up feeling I need to do what someone else thinks just because I asked for their opinion.

It is a journey for me and I’m aware now more than ever of the choice I always have to speak my truth in love. I’ve heard several times recently that the only time someone will accuse you of being selfish is when you don’t do what THEY want. That is an eye-opening perspective for me.

Part of this journey has been making peace with the understanding that I don’t need other people to agree with me. My truth is my truth. A gift of growing older is that I’ve learned more, experienced more and met others who comfortably live their truth. I examine what I think and why I believe a particular thing… and sometimes change my mind.

I believe in cooperation, collaboration and finding ways to work together. I think the ways we can come together are more important that the reasons that keep us apart. I also believe that we all just want to be heard, appreciated and loved.

I’m working with a couple of business collaborators on a tele-seminar around approval that was sparked from the Seth Godin quote at the top of this post. We aren’t sure how this will all come together, but we are excited about exploring the topic.

Your thoughts about this would be helpful as we gather information! Please share any comment that “addicted to approval” sparks within you, including ways you have “done work that matters by moving forward without perfect acceptance.”

I’ve also posted a question on LinkedIn if you would like to leave your comments there and see what others are saying.

Thank you!

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5 Responses to “Addicted to Approval?”

  1. Sherri Says:

    What great thoughts. I have been addicted to approval all of my life! I am now taking the steps to release from that and your post is just further affirmation to keep at it. (Btw, I found your post via Vanessa Lowry of the “Gratitude Girls”. They have a great facebook page “Day’s of Gratitude” as well as a very nice website and free e-book about living in gratitude: http://daysofgratitude.com/ )

    Thanks for your post,
    Sherri
    my blog: http://www.seeingmiracleseveryday.blogspot.com

  2. Sherri Says:

    Hi Vanessa –

    I didn’t realize this was YOUR blog until just now! Funny!

    Sherri

  3. Vanessa Lowry Says:

    Sherri, That is too funny!

  4. 5kidswdisabilities Says:

    I love this entry! So TRUE!
    Lindsey Petersen
    http://5kidswdisabilities.wordpress.com

  5. “When have you done work that matters without having perfect acceptance?” | The Awareness Initiative Blog Says:

    […] or approve of it? What was the result? Check out her blog post for other people’s stories (https://vanessalowry.wordpress.com/2010/01/31/addicted-to-approval/). Here’s […]

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